Winton Eliott
Narcissism derives its name from the figure in Greek mythology, Narcissus. He was renowned for his beauty and adored by the fraternity but often disavowed love- even when it came from a fairy called Echo.
Echo–who had her love for Narcissus rejected–cursed him to suffer from unrequited love. According to mythology, Narcissus was also known to fall in love with his own reflection and become very dependent on his shadow.
The term narcissism is used in psychology, then, to describe people who are arrogant, grandiose, thirsty for validation, and egocentric, as they only focus on themselves to the extent they find it difficult to empathize with others.
While narcissism does exist in varying degrees in every individual, it can cause some trouble if it has become a personality disorder.
Narcissism is often thought of as someone who’s conceited and boasts a lot.
However, not all narcissists fit this description. Some actually have very thin skin, yet they’re more vulnerable.
There are two types of narcissism- obvious and subtle. The latter is known as vulnerable narcissism, but what does that actually mean?
What is vulnerable narcissism?
Vulnerable narcissism is a type of narcissism that is characterized by deep insecurity and a need for constant validation from others.
As a result, vulnerable narcissists are often excessively afraid of rejection and are quick to react angrily when they feel slighted.
They may also withdraw from social situations altogether out of fear of being humiliated.
Like all forms of narcissism, vulnerable narcissism can be damaging to both the individual suffering from it and the people around them.
Withdrawal from social interactions can lead to isolation, while the constant need for validation can lead to codependent relationships.
If you suspect that you or someone you know may be suffering from vulnerable narcissism, it is important to seek professional help.
Only a trained mental health professional can accurately diagnose this condition and provide the necessary treatment.
How can you tell a vulnerable narcissist?
Vulnerable narcissists may display certain behaviors that can give them away, such as:
- Frequently seeking reassurance or validation from others
- Reacting angrily to criticism or rejection
- Has a strong need for attention and admiration
- Difficulty maintaining healthy relationships
- Low self-esteem and insecurity
It is important to remember that everyone experiences insecurity and may sometimes seek validation from others, but for those with vulnerable narcissism, these behaviors become pervasive and disruptive to their daily functioning.
How do people become vulnerable narcissists?
There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, as the causes of vulnerable narcissism are believed to be both genetic and environmental.
However, some experts believe that childhood experiences play a role in the development of this type of narcissism.
For example, children who are constantly criticized or invalidated by their caregivers may be more likely to become vulnerable narcissists later in life.
Additionally, some research suggests that people with certain personality traits, such as low self-esteem or a need for approval, may be more susceptible to developing this type of narcissism.
While the exact cause of vulnerable narcissism is still not fully understood, awareness of potential risk factors can help people be more mindful of their own mental health and seek treatment if necessary.
What is the difference between grandiose and vulnerable narcissism?
The key difference between grandiose and vulnerable narcissism are:
Level of self-esteem
Grandiose narcissists often have an inflated sense of self-importance and view themselves as superior to others, while vulnerable narcissists struggle with deep insecurity and low self-esteem.
Although both types of narcissism can be harmful, grandiose narcissism is generally considered more destructive because it is associated with a greater sense of entitlement and a lack of empathy.
Reactions to criticism
People with grandiose narcissism tend to react defensively or with disdain when they receive criticism. They may act superior and dismissive in order to keep others from challenging their view of themselves.
Additionally, they may try to belittle the person who criticizes them in order to make themselves seem more powerful.
People with vulnerable narcissism, on the other hand, may become angry or withdraw from the situation when they are criticized.
They might feel that their fragile self-esteem has been attacked, and they may react accordingly.
Need for validation
Both types of narcissists may constantly seek validation and attention from others, but vulnerable narcissists may be more desperate for this approval.
They may go to great lengths to obtain it, such as constantly seeking reassurance or becoming overly complimentary towards those they perceive as higher in status.
Grandiose narcissists, on the other hand, may believe that they are already superior and do not need to constantly seek validation from others.
Final thought
Vulnerable narcissism is a personality disorder that is characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, a need for constant admiration, and a lack of empathy for others.
While vulnerable narcissism is not as severe as other forms of narcissism, it can still lead to problems in personal relationships and at work.
Individuals with vulnerable narcissism often have difficulty keeping friends and may find themselves isolated.
They may also engage in manipulative behavior in order to get what they want.
While vulnerable narcissism can be damaging, it is important to remember that individuals with this disorder are not necessarily evil or deliberately hurtful.
With understanding and patience, it is possible to have healthy relationships with people who suffer from vulnerable narcissism.
