For the most part, people seem to want what everyone else wants: love and a partner.
Finally, who wouldn’t want to meet their other half and spend the rest of their lives with them? It seems like a pretty great deal.
But, for some people, that’s not what they want at all.
In fact, some people don’t want love or a partner and they identify as aromantic.
What does it mean to be an aromantic?
An aromantic is someone who does not experience romantic attraction.
While this may sound like a simple definition, it can actually be quite complex.
For some aromantics, this means that they are entirely indifferent to romance.
They may feel no desire to pursue or participate in relationships and may view them as unnecessary or even undesirable.
For others, being aromantic simply means that they do not experience the overwhelming feelings of love and passion that are often associated with romance.
This doesn’t mean that they don’t care about others or want close relationships, but rather that they don’t experience the same kind of “romantic” feelings.
There is no one right way to be aromantic, and everyone experiences it in their own unique way.
Read also: The high cost of men’s loneliness
Is aromantic a choice or a spectrum?
For many people, the idea of being aromantic is inconceivable.
How could someone possibly go through life without experiencing romantic love?
However, for a small but growing number of people, aromanticism is a very real identity.
While there is still much debate on the subject, it is generally agreed that aromanticism exists on a spectrum.
Some people may only experience a lack of romantic attraction under specific circumstances, while others may never feel romantically attracted to anyone at all.
There is also a great deal of variation in the way that aromantics experience other types of love and affection.
For some, platonic relationships are just as fulfilling as romantic ones, while others may not feel any desire for close relationships at all.
Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to identify as aromantic is a personal one.
However, as society becomes more accepting of non-romantic relationships, it is likely that more and more people will begin to explore their own aromantic identities.
Read also: Behind The Synthetic Love and Robotic Romance
What is the difference between aromantic and asexual?
Asexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a lack of sexual attraction to any person.
Aromanticism, on the other hand, is a romantic orientation characterized by a lack of romantic attraction to any person.
Though the two orientations are often considered to be similar, there are some important distinctions between them.
For example, an aromantic person may still experience aesthetic attraction or desire for close platonic relationships, while an asexual person may not.
Additionally, aromanticism is generally considered to be independent of sexuality, while asexuality is often seen as being intrinsically linked to sexuality.
As a result, someone can be both asexual and aromantic, or they can be attracted to people of any gender but not feel any romantic desire.
Ultimately, the key difference between these two orientations is the nature of the attractions that they involve.
Read also: Gay, bisexual men face a higher psychological risk
How does being aromantic affect relationships?
Being aromantic can affect relationships in various ways, depending on the individual’s preferences and needs.
Here are some ways in which being aromantic can affect relationships, based on the provided sources:
Different relationship priorities
Aromantic individuals may prioritize different types of relationships than those who experience romantic attraction.
They may seek emotional attachments and support from friends rather than romantic partners and may even develop especially close relationships with specific friends.
Non-romantic relationships
Aromantic individuals can and do form bonds of attachment with others in ways that are not romantic, such as platonic or familial relationships.
They may desire to live with another person or to have a long-term living arrangement that is not romantic in nature.
Different relationship styles
Aromanticism represents a spectrum, which means that people experience little to no romantic attraction.
While many do not ever have romantic relationships, some aromantic people are in long-term committed relationships.
These relationships may be non-romantic or romantic, and some of these include queerplatonic relationships, romantic relationships, and chosen families.
Pressure to conform
Aromantic individuals may feel pressure to conform to societal expectations of romantic relationships, leading to feelings of isolation or inadequacy.
They may feel pressured to demonstrate a romantic desire to please their partner, even if they do not experience romantic attraction.
Different forms of love
Aromantic individuals can still experience love and affection in many different forms and in different types of relationships.
They can form emotional and personal connections, and they can provide and benefit from empathetic support.
Aromantic people can still love their friends, family, children, pets, and their partners.
Common misconceptions faced by aromantic people
Aromantic individuals often confront various misconceptions and societal stigmas surrounding their romantic orientation.
These misunderstandings can perpetuate stereotypes and create challenges for those who identify as aromantic.
Here are some common misconceptions and a more in-depth look at each
Labeling as heartless or emotionless
One prevailing misconception is the unfair labeling of aromantic individuals as heartless or emotionless.
This assumption implies that they are incapable of experiencing love or forming emotional connections.
In reality, aromantic people have a diverse range of emotions and can experience deep connections, just not necessarily in a romantic context.
A belief that aromanticism isn’t real
Another misconception is the belief that aromanticism is not a genuine orientation but rather a concept fabricated for the “Tumblr generation” or as a fleeting trend.
Aromanticism is a valid and recognized aspect of human diversity, acknowledged within the broader spectrum of romantic orientations.
Assumption of childlike behavior
Some people wrongly assume that aromantic individuals, due to their lack of interest in romantic relationships, exhibit childlike behavior.
This misconception implies an underdeveloped or childish state, which is untrue.
Aromantic individuals, like anyone else, have diverse personalities, interests, and emotional maturity levels.
Incapability of loving Others
It is often misunderstood that aromantic individuals are incapable of loving anyone.
This misconception negates the depth and richness of the connections they can form with others.
Aromantic people can cultivate meaningful relationships, including friendships and familial bonds, demonstrating their capacity for emotional depth and connection beyond romantic involvement.
Common challenges faced by aromantic people
Aromantic individuals encounter a range of challenges that stem from societal norms, misunderstandings, and the pervasive assumption that everyone should experience romantic attraction.
Here’s a more detailed exploration of the challenges faced by aromantic individuals:
Pressure to conform to societal expectations
A significant challenge for aromantic individuals is the societal pressure to conform to conventional expectations of romantic relationships.
Society often places a high value on romantic love, making those who do not experience it feel as though they are deviating from the norm.
This pressure can lead to feelings of isolation and a sense of being “missing out” on a vital aspect of life.
Navigating social situations and relationships
Aromantic individuals often find themselves navigating social situations and relationships that are structured around the expectations of romantic attraction.
This can create discomfort and feelings of alienation, as their experiences and needs may differ significantly from those of individuals who do experience romantic attraction.
Understanding and accommodating these differences is a continual challenge.
Overcoming stigma and misconceptions
The stigma and misconceptions surrounding aromanticism present a substantial challenge.
Aromantic individuals may face judgment, stereotyping, or disbelief about the validity of their romantic orientation.
Advocating for greater awareness and understanding becomes crucial in overcoming these challenges, promoting inclusivity, and dispelling myths surrounding aromanticism.
Advocacy for awareness and understanding
Aromantic individuals often find themselves in the position of advocating for greater awareness and understanding of their romantic orientation.
This involves challenging stereotypes, debunking misconceptions, and fostering open conversations about the diversity of human romantic experiences.
Advocacy efforts contribute to creating a more inclusive and accepting society for individuals with different romantic orientations.
Building supportive communities
Establishing supportive communities can be challenging for aromantic individuals, especially when mainstream societal narratives heavily emphasize romantic relationships.
Finding like-minded individuals who share similar experiences and perspectives becomes vital for creating a sense of belonging and understanding.
How do you know if you’re aromantic?
There is no single answer to this question, as everyone experiences aromanticism in their own way. However, there are some common signs that may indicate that you are aromantic, such as:
You may find that you don’t feel any desire in romantic relationships
Many aromantics report feeling little or no desire for romantic relationships, and as a result, they often enjoy close platonic friendships.
While the exact cause of aromanticism is unknown, it is thought to be influenced by a combination of genetic and environmental factors.
Some people may find that they are aromantic from a young age, while others may only realize it later in life.
You may feel like love and romance are unnecessary
Another common sign of aromanticism is feeling like love and romance are unnecessary. This is often because aromantics don’t experience the same strong romantic feelings that other people do.
As a result, they may view relationships as being impractical or even undesirable. Additionally, some aromantics report feeling like traditional romantic relationships are too constricting or limiting.
You may prefer solitary activities
Since aromantics often don’t experience the same strong desire for companionship as other people, they may prefer to spend their time alone or with close friends.
This is not to say that aromantics never want to be around other people, but rather that they often enjoy solitary activities more.
Additionally, aromantics may find that they are less likely to enjoy traditional “romantic” activities, such as going on dates or getting flowers.
You may not feel the need to be in a relationship
Since aromantics don’t experience the same strong desire for companionship, they often don’t feel the need to be in a relationship.
This doesn’t mean that they don’t want close relationships, but rather that they are often content with platonic friendships.
Additionally, some aromantics may choose to be in a relationship for practical reasons, such as wanting to have children or needing financial support.
Ultimately, everyone experiences aromanticism in their own way, so there is no right or wrong way to be aromantic.
If you think you might be aromantic, the best thing to do is to learn more about the orientation and find out what works for you.
Read also: Is Your Partner Not Giving You Enough Emotional Support?
Can you be aromantic but still want a relationship?
While it is technically possible to be aromantic and still want a relationship, it is relatively rare.
Most aromantics are content with friendships and other non-romantic relationships. However, there are some aromantics who do desire a romantic relationship, even though they do not feel romantic attraction.
For these individuals, the desire for companionship and intimacy is often more important than the type of relationship. Whether or not an aromantic person wants a happy relationship is entirely up to the individual and there is no right or wrong answer.
Read also: The Ways To Building Strong And Long-Lasting Connections
What does it mean to be grey-aromantic?
Grey-aromantic people generally do not experience romantic attraction, but there may be exceptions.
For example, a person who is grey-aromantic might only feel romantic attraction under specific circumstances, such as when they have a strong emotional bond with the other person.
Grey-aromanticism is often considered to be a “middle ground” between aromanticism and romanticism, as it encompasses both people who do and do not experience romantic attraction.
However, it is important to note that grey-aromanticism is not simply a halfway point between the two; it is its own distinct orientation.
People who identify as grey-aromantic often feel that they are “between” or “in-between” aromantic and romantic.
They may also use terms such as “grey-a” or “greyan” to describe their orientation.
For some grey-aromantics, the lack of romantic attraction is not a conscious choice; they just do not feel romantic attraction, in the same way, that some people do not feel sexual attraction.
For others, the decision to remain aromantic is a deliberate choice.
Some grey-aromantics may eventually come to identify as aromantics, while others may move closer to the romantic side of the spectrum.
How to care for yourself as an aromantic person?
As an aromantic person, it’s essential to take care of yourself and find ways to navigate relationships that work for you.
Here are some tips and insights from the provided search results:
Develop and maintain a support system
Forge connections with individuals who genuinely care about you.
Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who understand and respect your identity.
These relationships affirm your self-awareness and reinforce the value you bring to connections beyond romantic ones.
Find like-minded individuals
While finding other aromantic individuals in your immediate circles may be challenging, online communities and support groups offer a valuable alternative.
Joining these spaces provides a safe and understanding environment to share experiences, exchange perspectives, and connect with like-minded individuals who appreciate your unique journey.
Listen to your concerns or frustrations
Establish open channels for communication when you feel misunderstood or invalidated.
Identify friends or family members willing to lend an empathetic ear, offering valuable feedback and perspective when sought.
Having a supportive network to share your concerns or frustrations contributes significantly to emotional well-being.
Find fulfillment through other avenues
As an aromantic individual, your fulfillment extends beyond traditional romantic relationships.
Explore and pursue hobbies, interests, and passions that bring you genuine joy and satisfaction.
Investing time in activities that align with your personal preferences contributes positively to your self-image and overall happiness.
Put in the work to understand yourself
Embrace the journey of self-discovery by putting in the work to understand yourself.
As an aromantic individual, navigating outside conventional norms can be challenging.
Dedicate time to self-reflect through practices like research or meditation.
Identify your needs, set clear boundaries, and continuously evolve your understanding of your identity.
The bottom line
Being aromantic means different things to different people. For some, it simply means that they do not experience romantic attraction.
Others may also feel a lack of interest in sex or emotional intimacy.
Some aromantic people identify as asexual, while others do not.
There is no one correct definition of aromanticism; it is simply a way of describing someone’s relationship to romantic and/or sexual attraction.
Aromanticism is not the same as celibacy or abstinence. Aromantic people may still have sex, but they do not do so for the purpose of forming a romantic or sexual relationship.
Similarly, an aromantic person may still form close friendships or other types of relationships, but these will not be romantic in nature.
For many aromantics, the idea of being in a romantic relationship is simply unappealing; they are content with platonic relationships and do not feel the need for anything more.
A common misconception about aromanticism is that it is the result of trauma or past hurt.
While it is true that some aromantics have had negative experiences with romance, this is not universally the case. Many aromantics simply prefer non-romantic relationships, and there is nothing wrong with that.
Aromanticism is not a disorder or a problem to be fixed; it is simply another way of experiencing the world.