Winton Eliott
When parents who haven’t had much experience with children begin to develop their parenting techniques, they typically choose between attempting to match the approaches from the homes in which they were raised or doing the complete opposite of what their parents did.
Some parents pick one of these choices and seek advice from books and parenting experts to improve their processes. All of this is completely normal.
What isn’t quite as common, but still happens frequently enough to be concerning, is when parents choose to infantilize their children.
What is infantilization?
Infantilization is the process of treating someone as if they are a child. This can be done for various reasons, including to make someone feel more powerless or to make them easier to control.
It can also be a form of endearment, such as when a parent refers to their grown child as their “baby.”
Infantilization can have negative consequences, however, as it can foster feelings of dependency and insecurity. It can also lead to a loss of self-respect and diminished self-esteem.
When infantilization is used as a form of control, it can be especially harmful, as it can prevent individuals from thinking for themselves and making their own decisions.
If you feel like you are being infantilized, it is important to speak up and assert your autonomy.
What are the causes of infantilization?
There are many different reasons why someone might choose to infantilize another person. These includes:
A desire for power or control
A desire for power or control is often at the root of infantilization. When this dynamic is at play, infantilization can be especially harmful, as it can prevent individuals from thinking for themselves and making their own decisions.
In some cases, infantilization may be used as a way to control someone through manipulation and fear. For example, an abusive partner may infantilize their victim in order to keep them from leaving the relationship.
In other cases, infantilization may be the result of systemic factors, such as sexism or racism.
When women and people of color are infantilized by those in positions of power, it reinforces their status as second-class citizens.
Regardless of the reason behind it, infantilization is a form of control that can have a deleterious effect on both individuals and society as a whole.
A lack of experience
Some parents who haven’t had much experience with children may turn to infantilization as a way of bonding with their children.
However, this can have a number of negative consequences. For one, it can send the message that the parent doesn’t think the child is capable of handling complex emotions or ideas.
This can lead to the child feeling dismissed and misunderstood. Additionally, infantilization can prevent the child from developing a sense of autonomy and self-confidence.
As a result, it’s important for parents to be aware of the possibility of infantilizing their child, and to make an effort to avoid it.
A desire to protect
In some cases, parents may infantilize their children out of a genuine desire to protect them. This can happen when parents are overprotective or helicopter parenting.
While the intention behind this behavior is often good, it can backfire. When children are constantly coddled and protected, they may never learn how to take care of themselves.
This can lead to feelings of dependency and insecurity. Additionally, overprotective parenting can prevent children from developing a sense of autonomy and self-confidence.
As a result, it’s important for parents to strike a balance between protection and independence.
What are the effects of infantilization?
Infantilization can have a number of negative consequences, both for individuals and for society as a whole. These include:
A loss of self-respect
When someone is constantly treated like a child, they may start to believe that they are not capable of handling complex emotions or ideas. This can lead to a loss of self-respect and diminished self-esteem.
A loss of autonomy
One of the most harmful effects of infantilization is the loss of autonomy that it can cause. When people are constantly told what to do and how to think, they may never learn how to make their own decisions.
This can lead to a dependency on others, and prevent individuals from reaching their full potential.
A diminished sense of self-worth
Infantilization can also cause a diminished sense of self-worth. When people are told that they are not capable of doing things for themselves, they may start to believe that they are not valuable or worth the effort.
This can have a negative impact on both their mental and physical health.
A decreased ability to think for oneself
Infantilization can also lead to a decreased ability to think for oneself. When people are constantly told what to do, they may never learn how to critically analyze a situation and make their own decisions.
This can lead to a reliance on others, and prevent individuals from reaching their full potential.
A lack of social and emotional development
Infantilization can also interfere with social and emotional development. When children are constantly coddled and protected, they may never learn how to take care of themselves.
This can lead to a dependence on others, and prevent them from developing a sense of autonomy and self-confidence.
How can we prevent infantilization?
There are a number of things that we can do to prevent infantilization, both as individuals and as a society. These include:
Encouraging independent thinking
One of the most important things we can do is encourage independent thinking. This means teaching people to question authority and to think for themselves.
It also means giving people the freedom to make their own decisions and to learn from their mistakes.
Respecting people’s autonomy
Another key way to prevent infantilization is to respect people’s autonomy. This means allowing people to make their own choices, without telling them what to do. It also means listening to people’s opinions and valuing their input.
Giving people the opportunity to grow
Finally, we can prevent infantilization by giving people the opportunity to grow. This means providing opportunities for learning and development.
It also means supporting people as they strive to reach their full potential.
The takeaway
Infantilization is a process whereby an individual or group is denied the status of adulthood and relegated to the position of the child.
This may be done for a variety of reasons, including political, social, or economic motives.
The infantilized individual may be denied certain rights and privileges, such as the right to vote or hold office, and may be subjected to different rules and regulations than adults.
In some cases, infantilization can lead to the loss of human dignity and worth. It is therefore important to be aware of the potential consequences of this process before engaging in it.
